Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
