38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize