whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize