i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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