I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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