An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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