Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize
