I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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