Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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