What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Is it because I queefed?
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
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