Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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