Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize