Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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