I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
