loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
