i just identified you from a description of your pipe
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
