You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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