return my video game
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
