we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
