Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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