One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
