We're facebook friends in real life
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
I wish there were birth control emojis
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I just had sex on a roof
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
