Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
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