she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
