I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
