The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
