I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Randomize
