Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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