Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
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