i just wanna soil my oats bro
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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