i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Randomize
