Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
