that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
