i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
