in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
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