going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize