weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
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