in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
So vagazzling was a success
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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