I can't watch pbs sober anymore
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize
