as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Randomize
