We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
