yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize