Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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