I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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