is your mom at the bar?
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Slut skills are useful in every country.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize