You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
only if we run a train.
done.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
