weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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