My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
