We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
