Are we in a gay sports bar?
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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