And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
